for those of you not familiar with the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, this contest encourages bad writing. The entry with the worse opening of a fake novel wins. Here is the 2005 winning entry.
As he stared at her ample bosom, he daydreamed of the dual Stromberg carburetors in his vintage Triumph Spitfire, highly functional yet pleasingly formed, perched prominently on top of the intake manifold, aching for experienced hands, the small knurled caps of the oil dampeners begging to be inspected and adjusted as described in chapter seven of the shop manual.
8 years ago